My first blog. I’m going to pretend I know what I’m doing. Tschere has this crazy idea that people will be interested in my adventures. She thinks a fairy living in a big city like Chicago and getting a job is a big deal…yada yada… like most fairies just live in the woods and spend their time dancing with the butterflies. Yeah. She’d be surprised how much she doesn’t know about us.
One time… and then I’ll get back to my story … I was sitting on the back on Tschere’s computer as she read from a website, telling me how fairies can appear and disappear in the blink of an eye and how we make tangles in people’s hair while they sleep … and take babies from them and leave changelings in their place. I laughed so hard I fell on to her keyboard and accidentally sent her to a porn site. Oh, the look on her face! It was weeks before I convinced her to do some real work again… at least it was weeks before she listened to any of my opinions.
You see, I was Tschere’s Life Coach and Mentor. Actually, I was her Opinion Fairy, but in her world, Life Coach sounds better. It was a part time gig, but it paid fairly well and Tschere was generous enough to share her marijuana candies with me.
But that’s enough. Tschere doesn’t need a mentor anymore and I need a job. Actually, I don’t need a job. I want one. So I’m going back to Chicago where I used to live. I like the big city, the lake, the rivers, and I want to see my old friends again. So, I spent money and got a airplane ticket. Yeah, I know. I’m a fairy. So, why am I going on an airplane when I could hitchhike?
Why don’t I fly myself? I’m afraid my wings are best for short distances. I mean, you can walk, but you wouldn’t walk from Colorado to Chicago, would you? Crows are the best for hitchhiking. Hawks are too moody. And owls? Well, besides having to fly at night, they’re really not the brightest stars in the sky… if you know what I mean. They may look wise, but there ain’t much going on under those feathers.
There’s one downside to hitchhiking. Can’t take luggage. Tschere says if I’m going to work with humans, I should start acting like one. Right. Means I gotta wear clothes. She was rather grumpy about it, too. I had just stopped by one day to ask her some questions and see what she thought about my plans. Okay, so I woke her up at 6 am. I used to do it all the time when I was working for her. This time, she was grumpier than usual and even started yelling at me because I wasn’t wearing clothes. I didn’t get it. Who wears clothes at 6 am? It never bothered her before, but then, I’d forgotten she’d only seen me small. Size is relative. If I was going to work with humans, it would be easier if I was their size. I explained all this to Tschere, after she screamed at me. For awhile she just stared at me and blinked now and then. Eventually, she nodded and muttered, “I’m friends with a fairy, why should this surprise me?” Then she listened to my plans.
People in Chicago are opinionated enough, she said. They don’t need to hire an Opinion Fairy. She decided it would be good for me to settle in first and try writing. People might not want to listen to their own “life coach”, but they’ll believe all sorts of stuff they read. Maybe I could get a job writing for the newspaper.
Maybe? Of course I could. They’d obviously jump at the chance to hire a real fairy to write for them. Not so fast, she says. You’re not going to just walk in the door like that, are you? She says. I didn’t see why not, but Tschere says she knows best. I’m just going to have to get used to wearing clothes. All the time. She’s taking me shopping tomorrow and loaning me her suitcase. She’s also loaning me her small computer which is what I’m using now.
And all this is why I’ll be flying in an airplane.
I’ll keep you posted.